The Booger Man’s Lament

Some years back, our great-grandson was somewhat resistant to bed time, to say the least, so one of Maureen’s ploys was to call next door discreetly and have Laura come over and rattle our windows. Then it was, “There’s the Booger Man! We have to turn out all the lights and go to bed so he’ll go home!” which was followed by sitting in the dark for twenty or thirty minutes while she endured a barrage of questions in the bedroom until he dozed off. Of course, there were nights when Bryson wanted to go outside and fight or make friends with the Booger, but in general he played the game correctly and we could turn the tv back on for an hour or so before bedtime. Was thinking about all this back before Halloween and came up with the following. And now you know the rest of the story. . .

Folks look at me kind of funny
because I look kind of scary
my face is kind of lop-sided
I may be a little too hairy
there’s a hitch or two in my git-a-long
my back has a little hump
but is that any reason
for people to see me and jump?

I will admit to peeking
into windows at night
cozy families make me warm & fuzzy
I don’t mean to cause a fright
and I’m really fond of children
I don’t want them to be afraid
they’re so lovable and sweet
especially sautéed

I guess it’s just my destiny
to be misunderstood
no one seems to want me
to live in their neighborhood


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